Another New Year.....

1966 was my first new year, so I don't remember it very well. ;) Other than mixed up memories of childhood New Years, no one New Year stands out until 1982 when I threw a costume party for my friends. It was a wonderful New Year, everything I could want it to be. I felt pretty, funny, happy and well loved. In 1983 was the New Years of every parents worst fears.... in involved way too much alcohol, too much travel, too many strangers, I think I was really lucky to have lived through it.

Then came the year 1984, little did I know that was to be my last 'single' New Year's Celebration. It was mine and Dirk's first date. We were married in October, so the year 1985 was my first New Year as a married woman, 1986 was my first (and only) New Year being 8 months pregnant, and 1987 was my first New Year as a college student. Then they all start running together again.

My favorite New Years were when we went to the cabin as a family, and then later just Dirk and myself. It has been a couple years since we have gotten away, but just reading, talking and processing the past year together was always special. Making plans for the New Year, walking in the quiet woods, and sleeping late cuddled together against the cold will always be the memories I hold dear.

This year is the year that will be remember as the beginning of major changes. A couple I am upset about: 1) for the first time my sister and I really totally disagree on appropriate parenting rules. Nathan is being allowed to spend the night at his girlfriend's house and Athena is being allowed to have a party with highschool girls and college boys with no adult supervision; 2) Mom's cancer is agressive and causing her lots of pain. 3) Dirk is on so many medications that even he doesn't remember what they are all for-- he talked about how much better he could think when he ran out of them a couple weeks ago, but then he went right back on as soon as he got home. 4) My weight is so hard to deal with, it takes so much work and focus and I don't know where that time and focus is going to come from.

Now the changes I am happy about: 1) Kayleigh is getting married and is doing what is necessary to finish her degree! 2) Athena will have a great schedule and classes she likes this semester. 3) Dirk is working hard to develop the acting, writing, and composing connections he made doing It's A Wonderful Life! 4) Nathan understands his job and driver's permit depend on his academics and he is no longer doing just the bare minimum. He is really working and wanting to do well. 5) Mom has a great doctor who listens and works with her!!! 6) My step-dad should be leaving for Iraq to drive support trucks for the military. He is excited and wants to go, it will also help ease some of the financial stress we have found ourselves in this year. 7) I ended the year with a 12 lb net weight loss for the first time in many, many years!!! Maybe I have some sort of handle on this disease. 8) I have a positive attitude and I believe it will be a great year. 9) I have a great new camera and with the help of DPS I will learn how to use it and photoshop. 10) I have a loving and supportive group of friends both on and off line!